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02 January 2007 @ 10:20 pm
my hair is not straight
oh, how i wish that it was
that would be great, yeah.
feelin': happyhappy
12 September 2006 @ 10:30 pm
so i went in to the local dance studio today to find out about classes. long story short, they told me there is a hip hop class that is at an intermediate level on friday at 6:30 and i am welcome to try it out and see if i can keep up, because i told them it's been like 4 years since i have taken classes. ahhh! i really want to go, i just hope i don't start freaking out from nervousness on friday and just not go. Im afraid ill put on my dance clothes on friday and see how fat i look (to clarify for anyone ready to choke me, "fat" in the dance world) and how out of shape i look and how im not as flexible as i used to be, nor can i walk around on my tippy-toes for 20 minutes because my calfs aren't as strong and nor that i can dance really hard for more then 5 minutes without getting completly out of breath..........yeah. im afraid that will happen. i'll try and not let myself think those things when the time comes.
feelin': excitedexcited
This is a copy from one of my favorite websites by Maddox (he's the man)

My balls are huge.

I was sitting around the other day admiring how big my nuts are, when I came to the conclusion that they are somewhere between fairly giant and super giant. It's like I have a pair of Epcot centers dangling between my legs. Of course, you have to have a pretty big pair to say some of the things I've said, and then go on national TV. That's part of the reason my balls are so astronomical. The last nine or ten false readings in gravity wave detectors have been due to the gravity field of my nads. They're just under critical mass, a few inches away from collapsing into a super dense vortex of nutsaqutron (a type of radiation given off by enormous balls).

I've made a chart to help you get a feel for the size of my jewels:
title or description

I don't even have an office chair anymore, I just sit around on my nuts. People come over to my house and they think I'm just sitting on a giant flesh colored bean bag. I once took a bullet right in the cojones just to prove how tough I am, but the bullet ricocheted off of a pube and shot some kid in the face. I almost felt sorry for the kid, but he had it coming. Nobody can step to my nuts. My ex-girlfriend was bitching at me one day, so I tossed my nuts at her. BAM. Knocked the bitch out cold. The best teabagging she ever received, and I wasn't even trying.
feelin': amusedamused
24 August 2006 @ 10:19 pm
but what kind of idiot decided that the serving size on fig newtons should be TWO FIG NEWTONS?!! i had 5 or 6 today!
i mean, how can 2 fig newtons be enough?! they are TEENY!
fuckin' prick.
feelin': boredbored
Current Music: the hives-your new favor
23 July 2006 @ 12:10 am
a joke.....for those retarded enough not to realize that
22 July 2006 @ 11:57 pm
I heard about perfection today.
It started in the shape of an oval, with the most delirious golden glow.
It was a lemon.
Too beautiful to speak of.
Oh lemon, how your juicy layers squirt all over!
Woe is your mother; Lemon, for your soul gets
squeezed out in a glass cup and mixed with sugar.
Oh how drinkable you are, you Lemon.
You Lemonade, created somewhere afar.
Too far for my lips to taste.
How i wish you were made for me.
Oh, misery.
feelin': accomplishedaccomplished
19 March 2006 @ 11:22 pm
ohh so pretty! i want! i want!
title or description

title or description

title or description
feelin': giddydrooly
19 March 2006 @ 11:13 pm
can someone please tell me why it is so freaking hard to find a GREAT strapless little black dress?!?!

i am looking for dresses to wear to my brothers best friend's wedding and it's going to be in this really fancy place with a lot of people, so i want to find something really nice, but i also want to buy a dress that i could wear afterwards...and i think that if i pair a strapless little black dress with some pearls and a colorful shawl or s short sleeved colorful jacket or cardigan or whatever this thing is called that im thinking of, on top, and maybe add something else, it would look okay to wear to a wedding....? hmmm..
alright i cant think anymore, im going to sleep.
feelin': frustratedfrustrated
19 March 2006 @ 08:10 pm
yay! i applied for a credit card!
a Chase Mastercard rewards card, that will give me gift certificates
to macy's and other places. woo hoo, i hope they don't deny me.
feelin': anxiousanxious
18 March 2006 @ 11:08 pm
octosausage (23:04:36): i say, old bean, have you seen my hat?
turtlebite5 (23:04:51): i beg your pardon?
octosausage (23:05:50): and who are you?
turtlebite5 (23:06:00): who are YOU?
turtlebite5 (23:06:06): you im'd me
octosausage (23:06:33): 'fraid not...
turtlebite5 (23:07:15): um...fraid so
turtlebite5 (23:08:08): okay mr. bean, are you going to tell me who you are or not?
octosausage (23:08:12): well obviously one of us is mistaken. If by chance I did actually IM you, rest assured it wasn't intentional. Carry on.
turtlebite5 (23:08:18): okay
turtlebite5 (23:08:19): ta-ta

feelin': confusedconfused